PMDD: Ahhhhhhhh FREAK OUT!

I spent a good three hours ranting and raving in my head this afternoon before I realized that OH. CRAP. It's that SUPER-FUN-TIME-OF-THE-MONTH again! I actually have it marked off on my calendar as "FREAK OUT" week. I literally get a text message from myself when my crazy brain takes over.

It's not that it reminds me that I'm crazy so much as it gives me a rather pleasant earworm:

I mean, c'est CHIC, right?

Only it's not so much fun to be in my head for this particular week every month.

I'm not sure what to do. I've tried what? Four different medications? None of them is right. Effexor made my  brain feel like a diabetic in a candy store, but it also increased my anxiety and made my vagina numb. Zoloft made me a zombie who didn't give a crap either way. I've been on Wellbutin for two months now (at the maximum dosage) and while it helps - in that I can actually RECOGNIZE that I'm being crazy - it does very little to turn the volume down on my crazy. Which, it turns out, isn't really all that helpful after all.

And then there are the orgasms.

Don't even get me started on that thread.

All this is just to say: being broken SUCKS. I wish I didn't have to deal with this. I wish my hormones didn't make me bipolar every month. I also wish my crazy week wasn't coinciding with both Genoa's birthday and the VERY EXCITING news that my brother is bringing me an adorable pair of nephews to fawn over this weekend.

Self-awareness is great and all, but sadly it isn't a solution.

I want out of my brain. Being this kind of prisoner is no fun at all.

Comments

[Birchsprite]

Evening Primrose Oil supplements ... definitely work for me, but you do need to keep on the case for at least a month to see the effects!

[Taylor]

i know ive mentioned it before, but if you havent tried yet yet consider taking niacin, zinc and magnesium supplements. Also, stream Food Matters on netflix - it changed my life and my mental health.

[Shawn]

Is doing something about that monthly visitor an option? I took Depo for 20 years to prevent ovarian cysts, and side effect was no period. I've went though mentalpause while on it, and now, since I no longer ovulate (which is when the cysts would form), I no longer need the Depo. I'm not sure if the Depo had anything to do with my gradual weight gain over the years, as I had a problem with that before starting it.

If you feel your crazies is related to your cycle, maybe doing something about your cycle??

[Mushkie]

I think you should try practicing some DBT (dialectical behavior therapy). It has been very helpful for people dealing with similar issues to yours. (P.S. I am being serious here and not snarky)

[yasmara]

We must be on the same cycle schedule! I yelled at my kids last night and then went oooooh (lightbulb!) at about 9pm when I was inhaling chocolate covered cranberries.

This is the brand of BC pill that has helped me a LOT in the past couple of months - LEVONORGESTREL-ETHINYL ESTRADIOL 0.15-30 MG-MCG - brand name Altavera. My insurance company (the bastards) switched me to some generic brand an it did *not* have the same PMDD-diminishing effects. I had to send a weepy email to my doc to force the scrip back to Altavera.

Obviously, it's not a 100% solution (see above re: chocolate covered cranberries) but it's made life a lot more bearable for me & everyone else around me....

[Lori]

I take Cymbalta with a bit of Buspar for the same issues you have. It's worked wonders.

[Kim]

I was put on Effexor for this same reason, but it made me feel awful. So then I thought, why am I on this type if medicine for what is clearly a hormonal issue? So I dropped it and went in the pill (yasmin) and have been fine ever since. I did note a drop in my libido, but apparently that doesn't happen to all.

[jill]

St. John's Wort. Works for me. And I have the pleasant side effect of crazy vividly dreams.