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GRAVY

  • My first novel started with a mole. Yes, a MOLE - a freckle, a birthmark, whatever you want to call it.
  • I was at the pool with my daughter getting ignored by our swim instructor when a lifeguard with a particularly ripped abdomen walked by. He stopped to flirt with one of the female lifeguards and my eyes flew directly to an adorable mole on the top can of his six-pack.
  • "How cute!" I thought (among other things). "He looks like a character in a romance novel!"
  • So I went home and started writing fiction for the first time. That was over a year ago and I still haven't been able to stop. GRAVY is the story of a suburban housewife who wants another baby, but gets a man with a mole instead.
  • GRAVY is now available on Kindle and Nook!

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« Chaos is the new black | Main | Once you go Brazilian, you never go back... »

September 21, 2011

Comments

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Christine Alen

Have you ever had a bikini or Brazilian wax?
YES!

What made you try it the first time?
Lasts longer than shaving

Did you go back? If not, why not?
a few times but, not many techs know how to deal with my plus size lady bits, it's emberassing sometimes....

If you've never had one, what keeps you from trying it? (Pain? Embarassment? Fear of nudity?)

Are you a shaver?
Not really, if i'm desperate i just use an epilating machine.


Question ? I tried to self-wax my lady bits, now i am peeling. What's the deal ?

Lori

I've never had one, and right now I just feel too fat--you could say fear of nudity/total and complete humiliation. Maybe next year. ;)

Carrisa

I've never had one. I don't really want one. It's all I can do to get my eyebrows waxed. I hate the pain and I hate the idea of getting on all fours for anyone but my husband. And since I don't wear bikinis or thongs, I don't really need a third party to do my grooming down there.

Although I'm really curious about the balls you waxed. Does he bring his own leather strap to bite down on or is that provided? How many ball waxings does it take before it becomes old hat and the screaming stops? Or does it ever? I told Thom about you waxing a dudes balls and he said it made his own balls disappear up inside him for a good hour. He can't fathom anyone ever wanting to do that or being able to tolerate the pain.

Mandi

I'm a shaver who would LOVE to try a Brazilian wax. My main fear is that because I'm a bigger girl and not model-thin that the waxist will be grossed out or judge me for wanting a Brazilian.

I also wondered, if I'm a shaver normally, should I let it grow out before I go in? Fully grown out or a little stubble?

Do you talk during a wax like you would with a hair stylist?

What % tip should I give?

Aside from being freshly showered, what can I do to make the experience pleasent for me and for the person doing the waxing?

Lisa

I've had a brazilian, but it was sugaring not wax. I've heard that waxing hurts more and I'm curious to hear if anyone has had experienced both.

Gennie

I wax, but not Brazilian. I went from shaving to waxing about 15 years ago because I was getting ingrown hairs from shaving. I'm pretty hairy down my inner thighs as well, so I now do bikini and upper-leg pretty regularly.

My worst waxing experience . . . the woman put triple antibiotic ointment on me afterward without telling me what she was doing, and I was allergic to one of the antibiotics. I broke out in a red itchy rash and I had gotten that wax right before a trip tot he beach! I was NOT happy. But in 15 years, that's the only bad thing that has ever happened.

Lori

Mandi, I heart your questions. I'd like to know all that, myself!

Ariel

How long can one expect to stay smooth vs. Shaving?

Cass

I've been going for a Brazilian almost monthly for the last year, and I love it. But for a long time I was terrified to try, the idea of the pain kept me from it.

What finally got me to try it was a Groupon of all things. I had started going to this place that specializes in Brazilians because my eyebrow waxer stopped doing it and I thought "if they can do a Brazilian, eyebrows should be a walk in the park" The Groupon coming out seemed like a sign to try more than just my eyebrows.

What I've learned though is the pain is not nearly as bad as I thought it would be. And definitely going more often makes it hurt a lot less (and grow slower).

As for the nakedness factor, I just figured they saw all kinds of people so my body wouldn't be all that different. If anything I'm more embarrassed if I hadn't shaved my legs before going. :-)

Jamie

What's keeping me from getting waxed is I'm just plain broke. What I want to know is how long does it last? How long will it be smooth before it starts getting stubbly? I can see it being well worth the expense if I stay smooth for an extended period of time.

Julia

Well this is just perfect since I got my first Brazilian yesterday!

I'm going on a cruise in November so I guess that was the kick off idea. I didn't want to shave for it! I tried it early as I have sensitive skin so I wanted to make sure I wouldn't have a reaction. Also, shaving just got annoying. Too many places to get into and I wanted something easier!

I'm going back in a month!

Used to be a shaver, but I think I'm done ;)

Mandi --- just a note, I'm a little overweight and uncomfortable with my body, but you need to find someone you're comfortable with. I had NO problem with my waxer - she was great, carrying on normal conversation, etc.

doahleigh

Have you ever had a bikini or Brazilian wax?
No. I don't know that I'm interested in trying it, but I am curious about how it all works.

If you've never had one, what keeps you from trying it?
I like having a little something down there. I may consider a bikini wax just to try it, but not a brazilian.

Are you a shaver?
I like to say I trim and shape. Some assume that means I shave in the shape of hearts and whatever. But I just like to keep things maintained.

My questions:
- Exactly how much does it hurt?
- For a brazilian, I mean, do you get rid of it ALL? Like all the nooks and crannies? That sounds a little weird, but you know what I mean.
- How do you keep it from being uncomfortable for your clients? Not physically uncomfortable, but socially? I'm ok with my doctor and my husband being up (down?) in my business, but a stranger with a pot of wax? I don't think I'm terribly modest, but I might find it a tad bit uncomfortable.

Elissa

Have you ever had a bikini or Brazilian wax?
Nope, but oh how I long for one!

What made you try it the first time?
N/A

Did you go back? If not, why not?
N/A

If you've never had one, what keeps you from trying it? (Pain? Embarassment? Fear of nudity?) being broke ass broke...

Are you a shaver?
Yes... BUT I get horrible razor burn no matter what I try if I shave anything other than lips...so I shave the "undercarriage" so to speak but not the front...

Any and all other questions would be super helpful!
I have often wondered how a massage therapist handles some nasty hairy gross dude (or worse yet, chick) who comes in... this takes that to a whole new level... Have you ever had a er... uh.... dirty (stinky) client? How do you deal? I would lurch and probably puke. Assuming you've encountered something nasty, how do you not lose it?

Brie

Have you ever had a bikini or Brazilian wax?

Yep, once!

What made you try it the first time?

Quite a few reasons:

I think it was about 6 years ago and having it done made me feel sexy, powerful and very feminine.

I wanted to prove it didn't hurt like some people claimed (and it didn't, it felt kind of awesome actually). I wasn't uncomfortable at all as the lady I saw was really friendly. Plus she was funny but still professional - which helps when your ass is in someones face!

I like the idea of not having to bring a razor too close to some of the more sensitive spots of my vag.

I LOVE having no hair around back. It's tricky to shave and SO nice to have it gone.

I wanted to see how smooth it really was and how long it lasted. I was disappointed to see it grew back in about a week. I remember she said that with more frequent visits it would grow back less - is that true? Thankfully it wasn't itchy but there was irritation with contact/friction and caused a rash.

Did you go back? If not, why not?

Nope. Cost has always been a factor. Also, I ended up plucking some hairs that were missed with tweezers (or that grew back at a faster rate) and that wasn't much fun. I would go again though if I could fit it into my budget.

Also, I was told I should have at least 1/4" of growth, but sometimes I'm not patient enough for that. Especially on specific spots where I really like to be smooth.

Are you a shaver?

Yes. I almost always used to get irritation but ever since I got waxed I hardly ever do anymore and it's awesome. I'm not sure if this is normal but it was a great "side effect" for me. I don't shave it all though - I leave a trimmed patch so I don't feel completely bald.

Also I think I might be lucky because I'm blonde and can get away with missed hairs.

Other questions:

They told me I needed about 1/4" of growth all around, can I get away with less?

Do you find any differences waxing blondes or redheads vs darker hair?

Are there different kinds of waxes to use or request (i.e. for people with really sensitive skin?)

What is the best way to manage aftercare so you stay smooth the longest?

What is the best way to prevent ingrown hairs? Loofah?

Is it a difficult request to ask the stylist to leave a little more than a landing strip but remove everything else?

And yes, the tipping question is a good one! I tipped $10 on a $45 cost but wasn't sure if that was normal. I like to tip and always consider it part of the service (and won't book if I can't afford that) but sometimes I can't always afford to give as much as I would like.

hypothetical: If you saw the same stylist do you think they come to expect to receive the same tip each time?
In your opinion would you be happy with a $20 tip one time and then smaller $5 tips for the next two visits, then a bigger tip again when your customer could afford it? Is there any way to discuss this without either party feeling awkward?

Faith

Have you ever had a bikini or Brazilian wax?
YES!!! Brazilian.

What made you try it the first time?
Its all Mandi's fault. I always got annoyed with shaving it, but the ginormous bush I get if I don't wasn't an option. So Mandi's adventure into wax land caught my attention and convinced me to try it.

Did you go back? If not, why not?
Yes, I will go back. There were a few moments it hurt like hell... but I still think it was worth it.

If you've never had one, what keeps you from trying it? (Pain? Embarassment? Fear of nudity?
Pain... but also lack of education weirdly enough.

Are you a shaver?

Any and all other questions would be super helpful!
Put a bit up on after care... like how to avoid ingrowns and that whole bit on what you are and are not allowed to do after. I am still kinda pissed my technician(? is that what you all are called? or waxina... or Destroyer of hair follicles?) didn't tell me about the after care stuff.

Tamara

I got my first one earlier this year, mainly because I was shaving and got tired of it. I was nervous about trying but then you had a post about getting one and I decided to give it a try. I thought it would be embarassing since I wanted full "naked kitty" but my waxist is great! She is really good at it, minimal pain and I love how long it lasts. It's great for my sex life too!

I would also like to know what other things I could do in preparation, if anything, cleaning, etc.

jenny

I want to try it! How many wax strips does it usually take? Or does that depend on how much hair you have? I'm a shaver, and I know you are supposed to let some grow out or else it wouldn't have anything to grab onto.
Also what position are you in? on all 4's? Or dorsal recumbent? Like how you are at the ob? Thanks for opening this question up!

Dawn

It sounds like a real PITA...what are the pros of being bald down there?

Very curious...I feel like the beaver may be an endangered species.

Very curious indeed.

RebeccaL

What excellent timing! I just got my first partial brazillian tonight. I decided to try it after reading this http://www.crazyauntpurl.com/archives/2011/09/the_waytoomuch_1.php
Honestly I had been thinking about it for a while now. Part of it is rediscovering myself after a divorce and trying to see what I like before I get another guy in my life who has an opinion.

I haven't decided if I will go back or not. The discomfort will not prevent me from doing it again. I had shaved once and I will NOT do that again. The itch from regrowth was worse than the temporary pain of waxing.

The only question I have is that I was told it would be less painful next time if I came back after 4 weeks. True?

Balebusta

I've been waxing for 15 years (and yes I do brazillian -- actually I take everything off) and I have one good story and one comment:

Story: Ladies -- do not try a brazillian at the local nail salon...they *might* be ok for a quick eyebrow wax or arm wax or something (even that can be pushing it), but trusting someone who doesn't specialize in waxing to pour boiling wax on your good girl is a bad idea. I learned that lesson the hard way. This was during college and I had a date that night...normally I would drive home from school for a weekend to take care of all my grooming at the NYC places I knew and trusted but I figured, why not just get a wax at the nail salon after my manicure -- WRONG. She used wax that was so hot that it ripped a gash in my labia and I started bleeding all over. In my youth not only did I not sue or file a complaint, I paid for the service and walked out bleeding with toilet paper stuffed in my panties. Luckily one of my boyfriends at the time was a plastic surgeon and he examined me at home and fixed me up so I didn't have to face the humiliation of going to an ER.

Comment/Question: I wax regularly but I still seem to only get about 7-10 days at most of absolute smoothness before hair starts growing back...WTF?! Shouldn't I be guaranteed at least two full weeks of smoothness? Or do I just have pubic hair with super powers? And if so, why doesn't the hair on my head grow as quick and as thick? Just saying'

taylor k.

Have you ever had a bikini or Brazilian wax?
yes! about 3 weeks ago.

What made you try it the first time?
all the blogging you've done about it sparked my initial intrest, i suposse. I mean, i had thought about it before but never really thought someone with my body should go and do it. My mom -on a little bit of a dare- bought me a gift certificate for me to go and do it.

Did you go back? If not, why not?
Not yet. Our local place (that is a real place, not a strip center asian hair and nails and facial and massage with happy ending type place) charges $87 before tip, so cost has been a factor.

If you've never had one, what keeps you from trying it? (Pain? Embarassment? Fear of nudity?)
embarrassment. i have lost and gained over 100lbs multiple times in the last 5 years and have had two kids about about 7 abdominal surgeries. I am only 26 years old and i have lots of extra skin and tons of scars).

Are you a shaver?
was. but i would like to be a brazillian girl for the rest of my life now. i only have about 63cents to my name right now and i'm broker than broke. I just gave up everything i owned and moved into a camper full time WITH BOTH OF MY LITTLE KIDS IN TOW! So, to say i have no extra cash for a brazillian would be an understatment! I put a paypal donation link up on my blog, but have not gotten one hit. I'm looking for work, so hopefully i'll find a job soon. My husband does work, but that barely keeps us afloat.

Amy

I got my first southern wax back in January to prep for the birth of my second child. With my first, my belly didn't really get in the way, but numba dos did and I didn't want my OB doctor to envision Kramer (from Seinfeld) or Don King whilst staring into the depths of what I've always refered to as, The Tarantula. I first had to assure my new best friend that I had no varicosed veins in that area. HUH? Then I let my sister go ahead of me to make sure that it really wasn't all that bad like my friends kept saying. That's what older sisters are for, right? And it actually wasn't so bad. I opted for a landing strip rather than the brazilian I'd gone in for. My hair is very coarse, so I did bleed a tad but no biggie. My waxer and I had a pleasant conversation and she was very soft spoken and relaxing. In fact once she told me her sons were named Taj and Zen, I knew I was in good hands. However, to my surprise, It didn't last that long. Two weeks after I took that plunge I gave birth and was MORTIFIED by the all the pubes that showed up to pay respect for the recently departed. Have I gone back? Although initially I felt super sexy and wanted to show the world my new labiascaping, I knew the stress of such high maintenance beauty would only heighten the anxiety of already trying to find time for a pedi and a full foil with a blow out. Oh, and just the opposite happened to me. I now get ingrown hairs. They actually look like tiny scabs and when I scratch the surface and the crust comes up, a coarse black hair erects like a microscopic Jack-in-the-box. Is that normal? It's been 7 months! Also, a friend of mine who waxes in a different state serves up a cocktail or vodka shot prior to the procedure. Is that normal? Cause I'd be all about that! Oh, and btw, if you wanna read a good story about me nearly disfiguring myself down there with a quick scissor trim, check it out http://jezisjibbajabba.blogspot.com/2010/03/scene-from-psycho.html

Grace

Have you ever had a bikini or Brazilian wax? --Nope not yet. But I'm seriously thinking about making an appointment.

What made you try it the first time? Did you go back? If not, why not?N/A

If you've never had one, what keeps you from trying it? I usually just trip "the bush" and shave the bikini area

Are you a shaver? I usually shave the front bikini line only


** Do they start working from the front or the back?
** Do they do the more intimate bits last?
** What if there are stray hairs? Do they leave them? Do they pluck for you? Or are we on our own?
** What minimum length do the hairs need to be for a good wax? 1/4 inch? 1/2 inch?
** How long does a first appointment usually take?

Jen

Have you ever had a bikini or Brazilian wax?

Yes - multiple Brazilians

What made you try it the first time?

I don't even remember now! The first Brazilian I ever had, I did myself (minus the backdoor - that's a feat of contortion I wasn't up for!) But it takes a lot more time to do it yourself, so at some point I switched to a pro.

Did you go back? If not, why not?

Yes, but I haven't for awhile. In my area (DC-metro area) it can cost anywhere from $65-100 for a good Brazilian, before tip. So it is a pretty significant expense.

Are you a shaver?

No! I hate, hate, hate shaving! I'd much rather wax, including doing it myself, than shave.

Other questions:

One of the other reasons I haven't gone back is that I had a baby last year and was left with some "backdoor" issues (namely, hemorrhoids). They aren't really bad, but they are there and I am self-conscious about it. I know you are relatively new to the game, but is this something that waxers are used to seeing, in general?

Janyll

No, never have and never will.
Because I have no desire to look like an 8 year old or a porn star. (Until the advent of internet porn, no one dreamed of hairless vaginas on adult women.) Just what womankind needs--another body part/physical attribute that must be changed from its natural state to fulfill some male fantasy. And with pain involved, too! Foot binding anyone?

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