Recipe for Potato Salad (for picky eaters like me)

Here is the somewhat short list of things I don't like to eat:

Pickles
Olives
Green onions
Raw celery
Cilantro
Basalmic vinegar
Olives
Lamb (a smell that so horrifies me, I won't even let it into my house even though Dave loves it)
Brie cheese
Blue cheese (it's ROTTEN cheese!)

So I'm sure it's pretty obvious why I always thought I hated potato salad.  It usually contains green onions, raw celery or worst of all, PICKLE RELISH.  Mine, however, contains none of the above and is still fairly tasty, if I do say so myself.

I learned this recipe from my Sister-in-law, Lynne, who was welcomed into the family with open arms in no small part DUE TO her recipe for potato salad.  When we lived in California, Dave would come up with excuses for us to have a BBQ, just so she would have to make it.  So the first time John and Lynne came to visit us here in Washington, she happily shared the recipe and we made it together.  I discovered that after a couple of small modifications, I could easily arrive at a potato salad recipe that while not the same as Lynne's original, was something we could both eat.

So this is how I make it!  If you decide to make it, too, I advise you to PLAN AHEAD.  This recipe is  relatively simple, but it TAKES FOREVER.  Like two or three hours (depending on how many kids you have and how many times they get up after you send them to bed).  And then you really need to let it sit overnight in the fridge before you serve it.  It improves the flavor by about 100%.

Here's the cast of characters.  If it looks like I just threw all that stuff on the counter and then snapped a picture, well that's because that's what I did.

5 pounds of YUKON GOLD potatoes
3 cups of finely chopped SWEET onions (Walla Walla or Vidalia work best)
9 eggs
1 pound of bacon (or more depending on how much you like bacon)
2-2.5 cups of Best Foods/Hellman's Mayo (is there any other brand?)
Yellow mustard
Salt
Pepper
White wine vinegar

Let me stop right here and tell you that this makes A LOT of potato salad.  Enough for probably ten people, maybe more.  When I cook something this labor intensive, I cook A LOT OF IT.  If you don't have that many mouths to feed, you could easily halve this recipe and make enough for a family of five, plus leftovers. 

The first thing I do is fill my biggest pot with water, throw 3-4 tablespoons of salt into it (as a rule, most people don't salt their potato/pasta water enough!) (also this is the only place I add salt to this recipe), and get it boiling for the potatoes.

Then I start hard-boiling my eggs.  Two years ago my mom bought this handy dandy egg boiler for my husband because he was on the Atkin's diet.  The man has barely ever used it, but I LOVE it.  It's one of those appliance I'm generally against because it serves only ONE purpose, but it produces perfectly hard-boiled eggs every time and the shells peel off perfectly in one piece without all those pesky little gouges I used to always get.  You'll need 7 to 9 hard boiled eggs for this recipe.

Next I get out the potatoes.
I can't emphasize strongly enough how much I love Yukon Gold potatoes.  They are buttery and creamy and much harder to overcook than russets. 

The only drawback is that being smaller, they take a little longer to peel.  But I just pull up a stool or two for my "helpers."

Alex helps peel and Genoa is in charge of putting the peeled potatoes into the colander.  Dave is in charge of handling those bottles you see on the counter behind us.

After peeling and rinsing, I quarter the small potatoes and sixth the bigger potatoes. (Is sixth a word?  I mean chop the larger potatoes into six pieces instead of four so that they're all relatively the same size).  Like so:

Then I throw them into my big pot of water, which is now at a rapid boil.

After adding the potatoes, I wait for the water to boil again and then cook the potatoes for approximately 1o minutes.  I actually set a timer as soon as the potatoes start to boil so I don't get distracted and forget.  10 minutes is just about right, but I cook the potatoes until I can break them in half with a wooden spoon using just a little bit of pressure, slightly less cooked than how I usually make them for mashed potatoes.

By now, my first set of eggs is done and I run them under cold water for a few minutes to cool them down.

In the meantime, I get started chopping onions.  And I can't chop anything in my kitchen without singing Dana Carvey's Chopping Broccoli song.

The onions are probably the most important part of this recipe.  You REALLY want to find SWEET onions.  Walla Walla or Vidalia are perfect, but if you can only find regular yellow onions, you'll probably want to use less than the three cups this recipe calls for otherwise it might get too oniony.  The good thing about sweet onions is that they are so mild and well, sweet.  Anyway, time to get chopping!  This recipe calls for THREE CUPS of finely chopped onions. 

Right as I was starting on the onions, my potatoes finished cooking.  I drained them and then set the colander in front of our portable fan to cool off.  It still took forever.

Wait!  Did I just say that the ONIONS were the most important part of this recipe?  Because that was a lie.  The most important part of this recipe, hands down, is the BACON.

Once everything else is cooking/cooling/chopped, I start cooking the bacon in the microwave.  On a stack of paper towels, like so.

Then, once the potatoes are cool to the touch, I coat them with a very thin layer of white wine vinegar, maybe a quarter of a cup.

Then it's time to start dumping everything into your biggest bowl.  I added two cups of onions first and then later decided it wasn't enough.

Then I slice up NINE hard-boiled eggs and throw them in and then measure out TWO CUPS of Best Foods Mayo.  It sounds like a lot, but the last thing you want is for the potato salad to be dry.  Honestly, this was the first time I measured ANYTHING in this recipe.  Normally I keep adjusting it until it tastes right, but that's not exactly what people want to hear for a RECIPE (a bunch of potatoes, some eggs, lots of mayo, not really specific enough), is it?

Next I add a couple teaspoons of fresh ground pepper.  You could add some salt here, too, but Dave is EXTREMELY annoying sensitive to excess salt, so I rarely ever salt anything anymore.

Next, I finish chopping up all that bacon (this is only part of it!).

And throw it into the big fat bowl.

And then it's time for the WORK OUT portion of the recipe, in which you use a METAL spoon to stir, and stir, and stir, and stir some more.  I use the metal spoon so I can break up the larger chunks of potato and eggs as I go.  I usually taste it several times during the stirring 1) because I need to adjust things like salt, pepper and mayo and 2) I need a reward for all that hard labor.

In the end, it looks like this and tastes pretty darn good for something that is basically just glorified egg salad.  ENJOY!

Mandajuice's Potato Salad (for picky eaters)

5 pounds of YUKON GOLD potatoes (NO SUBSTITUTIONS)
3 cups of finely chopped SWEET onions (Walla Walla or Vidalia work best)
9 eggs
1 pound of bacon (or more depending on how much you like bacon)
2-2.5 cups of Best Foods/Hellman's Mayo (is there any other brand?)
Yellow mustard
Salt
Pepper
White wine vinegar

Boil the potatoes and hard-boil the eggs.  Allow to cool.  Drizzle potatoes with thin coating of white wine vinegar (1/4 cup).  Cook and chop bacon.  Combine potatoes, eggs, onions, bacon, mayo, mustard, pepper and salt to taste.  Stir with a metal spoon until creamy.  Enjoy!

SOME POSSIBLE VARIATIONS:
Lynne uses russet potatoes, green onions, and fewer eggs and then adds a small can of chopped olives.  Hers is MUCH, MUCH prettier to look at with all those colors. 

I like to serve this recipe in a bowl and then top the entire thing with MORE chopped bacon.  You can never serve too much bacon.

The only other variation I've tried (and loved) was to add those chopped seasoned almonds you can buy in the salad aisle.  I thought they added just the right crunch, but Dave didn't like the texture.

Comments

[Rhi]

Two things: My grandma was quite the entertainer in her day and kept a little file with people's food allergies and things they didn't like. I should make you a little index card should I ever have you over :)

Secondly: Alton Brown says the only uni-tasker allowed in the kitchen is a fire estinguisher, but I have an egg cooker and I LOVE IT. But, I also love hard boiled eggs.

Oh, turns out there are 3 things: I've never had potato salad with Yukon Golds, but GOSH that sounds YUMMY!

[Kizz]

For color and crunch I add raw peas or raw bell peppers in pretty colors. It's different but usually nobody minds since it's mostly for the crunch of it.

I love cheese, the stinkier the better. All cheese is, technically, moldy milk. Bleu cheese just has different mold! :)

[David]

It is quite good. The only thing I would add would be black olives.

What is it with you and lamb? Leg of lamb is awesome.

[Amber]

It still has ONIONS OF DEATH in it, no matter what kind they are. And yes, there may be another brand of mayo now that Kraft has a 1/2 fat version with olive oil. I haven't opened it yet, so I'll let you know. I may have to get me an egg boiler. I had no idea they existed and hard boiled eggs are Chad's usual work breakfast. It can be annoying trying to keep track of when the water started boiling. I'm not going to stand over the pot and watch. That would be the same fun-ness level as watching paint dry.

[Becca]

Amen to cilantro/corinader and the mouldy cheeses!
Did you know not liking coriander is genetic, some kind of enzyme. It's just bitter soap to me and my dad.
As for "evil cheese" as I call blue cheese et. al., I'm allergic to the penecillin family, which is what those cheeses use. Blech!
But this recipe looks much yummy. I'd have to add salt to it, cuz (opposite to you) you can never add too much salt for my fella. We run out so quickly in my house!
Becca :)

[Kate]

I am so excited because I have been wanting a recipe for Potato Salad and I too hate pickle relish! My husband did not care for the last recipe I tried that had pickle relish, dijon mustard and celery so, I am excited to try your recipe... plus, who doesn't love bacon! also, thanks for the pictures, they really help...

[kheatherg]

I could never eat your potato salad.... Hell, i barely like anyone elses.... the whole HB egg thing and the egg thing and the egg thing...LOL
Im not a egg-kinda-girl. Is it obvious?

Therfore, i've fallen in love with macaroni salad. Do you have a good recipe for that? I would love to see it as i love it when you post recipes!!

I often tell my mom......check manda's recipe on her website and make that-make that! Because she's such a good cook like you.

The glove thing... cracks me up everytime i see you wearing them!

[G-mom]

Daughter will not eat potatoe salad and when I do make it the 1st thing out of her mouth is "you didn't hide any eggs in here did you"?. I LOVE the egg maker thing! Wooo gonna get one of those. Hopefully I will be able to find it. I love all kinds of food...don't like peanut butter and cooked beets.
I really enjoy your recipes have you ever tried red potatoes in your salad? You don't have to peel and they are awesome. I especially love them for mashed. I started using them a 100 years ago when I found out the skin had the most nutrients.
Everyone loves my potato recipes. But as daughter said if you have a good macaroni salad recipe pass it along!!!

[Kate]

Update: i made the potato salad and everyone loved it, thank you!

[Potato recipe]

Very best and simple recipe... Am gonna try this...
https://www.yousendit.com/transfer.php?action=batch_download&send_id=817789614&email=7cff47bb7cdcb76fbfa15e66c81a1961

[Picky eaters salad]

You had done a good recipe for picky eaters.....
https://www.yousendit.com/transfer.php?action=batch_download&send_id=817789614&email=7cff47bb7cdcb76fbfa15e66c81a1961